I’m Never Going to Wipe Her Ass

Recognizing your boundaries as a caregiver…before you ever are.

photo by Alison Acheson

If you are a caregiver, you probably have no time to read even half of this article.

If you know someone who is a caregiver, read and consider sharing. (After handing them a mug of tea. With something more in it.)

If you’ve never been a caregiver, read and remember.

Because it’s quite likely that you will be in this position someday — if you have a parent, a spouse, a beloved friend, children — in other words, if you have people in your life. (If you don’t have people in your life, get some. Even though you know there is pain ahead when you connect with another one of us.)

Caregiving, when it happens, can blindside you to the point that you do not have time to think; you just DO.

The reality:

Two weeks before my fifty-first birthday, my spouse was diagnosed with ALS, and as it turned out he had a rather rapid form. For almost a year, I became a 24/7 caregiver. And it wasn’t until that time was over, and he was gone, that someone told me a story.

The story was about a couple, a couple who loved each other deeply. And when the wife became ill, the husband vowed to take care of her to the best of his ability.